The Santa Picture
How to Meet Santa for the First Time Ever:
1. Put on your best dress and wait patiently in line at the mall.
2. When it’s your turn, sit on his lap without crying.
3. Let him know you have the same name as his favorite aunt.
4. Notice his (real) beard and grab a handful of it.
5. Yank. Hard.
6. While Santa’s eyes are watering from the pain, let go and look around for mom. Your work here is done.
Santa will definitely remember you, take pity on your parents, and leave a few scraps of leftover wrapping paper under the tree for you to play with on Christmas morning.
I look forward to many more moments like this with Helen & Brian, and I’m sending you all best wishes for your holiday with your families & friends.